Grief Counselling in Sydney CBD

Grief Counselling is a professional service which as the name implies counsels you through grief.  Grief is one of the hardest things we ever have to go through.  Yet it’s also one of the things that all of us have to go through.  There is no avoiding it.  Eventually you will suffer loss.  A grief and loss counsellor will help you understand what is happening to you and how to get through grief.  They will support you the whole time and all the way through until you can find your joy and happiness again.  Even in very severe and complicated grief a grief counsellor will help you get through.  With professional help you will get through it.

Grief is tough.  There is no question about it.  However we can get through grief if you know how.  The problem is, in modern society we often find ourselves avoiding grief so we don’t have to feel the pain of it.  Needless to say, trying to avoid loss from the little lost things of our lives to the great terrible losses of our lives is impossible.  No one gets through life without loss, big or small.  So if it is something we can’t avoid, or distract ourselves from then what do we do?  The answer is we face it.  There is an old adage, the only way through fear is through fear.  It’s the same with grief.  The only way through grief is through grief.  What this means is feeling grief and loss is normal all be it very painful.  But the only way to get over grief is to go through it and come out the other side.  Through grief and loss counselling your professional counsellor will help you get through grief in the quickest, simplest and least painful way possible.

The loss of someone you love is one of the most painful experiences you can ever have.  Yet we know that all of us will go through loss of a loved one.  So how do you cope.  It can help to understand that it is a process and there is a way through.  First there is the shock and disbelief, when you say to yourself, Oh My God I can’t believe they’re gone.  Then you might try to prove to yourself that they aren’t gone, this is called searching and denial behaviour. It is really a normal process where your brain is trying to cope and over time you come to realize that they are gone.  After the shock and disbelief and the searching and denial people often experience that they are emotionally very up and down.  One minute they are sad, then angry then happy, then worried.  After this stage comes resignation.   During this stage you know that the person you loved is gone, but you don’t like it.  Finally comes the acceptance stage in which you know they’re gone and they aren’t coming back and you’re ok with it.  Once you’ve reached this stage people start to look to the future more optimistically.

There is a caviat though.  What I described above is really for simple grief.  If it is complex, that is there is some factor that makes it distressing or confusing the process is more complex.  Yes, you still have to go through the process descibed above, however you also have to go through the process of making sens fo the additional confusion and complexity.  In any case a grief counsellor can help you work through the process of going through the grief until you come out the other side.

One of the most common places we feel grief is in Marriage and relationships.  Most of us expect that marriage and relationships should bring us joy and happiness, and while this is true for the most part, sometimes we experience grief and loss through marriage and relationships.  Sometimes our partner of a long time dies or leaves us.  Sometimes our marriages don’t work out the way we want and we can feel the loss of the dream relationship.  On other occasions, we will be betrayed uncovering an infidelity.  In many cases the grief that can occur in marriage or relationships can be as bad or even worse than when someone dies.  If you do find yourself in a relationship or marriage that is struggling with grief, and you would like to help a professional counsellor trained in Grief counselling will help you make sense of the craziness and move on to getting your life back on track.

Grief and loss is one of life’s most challenging experiences.  The reason it’s challenging is because it hurts.  It can hurt so much that we are brought to tears and we can become incapable of functioning.  The hurt can be bad enough to make us think that life is over.  When this happens it can help to understand why it is so painful.  You see anything we love or come to depend on becomes so imprinted on our psycho-neuro-physiology that when it isn’t their or it is take away from us literally have a great big empty hole in our minds, body and emotional regulation system.  No matter how hard we try we can’t fill that hole because the loss is permanent.

What can make the pain even worse is if it is complicated.  For example if someone is old and they have had a good life and they pass away gently in their sleep, then those who are left behind might even feel some relief amidst the emptiness.  We can feel well I’m sad they’re gone but at least they had a good life and the passed away peacefully.  In other cases someone might be young and are killed in tragic accident or are murdered needlessly.  When this happens the pain can be immense because not only do you now have a great big hole in your heart you also have to deal with the needless waste.

When this happens seeking the help of a highly trained professional counsellor can make the adjustment doable.  You wont feel alone, and you wont be left to work through the pain and confusion yourself.

We have been studying grief and loss in psychology for a very long time.  Probably since humans first realized we can feel great pain when we lose something we love or have grown attached to.  There can be no doubt that coming to terms with grief and loss are some of life’s greatest challenges.  Grief and loss counselling can help you in many, many ways.  First of all you’re not alone when you have a counsellor you can confide in.  A professional counsellor can help you make sense of what’s happened and support you as you rebuild your life.  What’s more there are things that a highly trained counsellor will know that you need to know that you just wont get from family and friends.

For the most part grief counselling works by helping you know you’re not alone, while simultaneously helping you understand what’s happening, what to expect, and what the stages are.  In most cases people simply tell their story of grief or loss and the counsellor will help take care of the rest.  Most people who seek grief counselling find they receive immediate benefits and are able to move smoothly from distress to acceptance and ultimately optimism again.

Much of the work in grief counselling is simply you telling your story to someone who cares, understands and can help you make sense of it all.  If you are struggling with grief a professional grief counsellor will help you immensely.